May 27, 2010
"He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young."
A sweet friend shared this verse with me the other night and then Grief Share used it in a recent email too. When I was pregnant with my second son, God gave me this verse to calm a fear I had within me about what kind of world this son would grow up in.
After Jim went Home to Heaven, the Lord reminded me of it again, especially the promise that He "shall gently lead those that are with young." A grieving parent needs to be lead gently, because she is a broken hearted person trying to comfort and lead broken hearted children. She is ever mindful that her steps are being followed and she is often very hard on herself.
Once again God reminds me of His promise not only to gently lead me, but also that "the lambs," my little ones, are being carried close to His heart. They are especially dear to Him. Oh, the peace to know that my children are near to the heart of God, the Great Shepherd.
May 25, 2010
"As arrows are in the hand of a mighy man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate."
Last week we got out Daddy's bow and arrows. We took turns attempting to shoot feeling like Indians or Jonathans or great hunters.......
We discoverd something interesting. Only three arrows had tips. How appropriate for a man who had three boys.
My mind drifts to an article I read some where
Lord, help me to guide them to find their special purpose in Your hands and not compare themselves among themselves. To keep their eyes on You and Your target for their lives.
May 21, 2010
I read this in a Grief Share email today:
This feeling of loneliness and the consciousness that you are not part of a couple may cause you to avoid going into group situations where most of the other people are couples. God disagrees with the idea that three's a crowd. He reveals in His Word that great strength is available when three people come together.
(Ecclesiastes 4:12 & Matthew 18:20)
Tonight Ecclesiastes 4:12 really stood out to me. My mom had three kids, so all the time when we were quarreling as a child, I'd hear, "Two company, threes a crowd." I respectfully disagree. I think it is possible for three siblings to get along and be close knit. So I keep reminding my boys, "A threefold cord is not easily broken." It wasn't until tonight, that I realized this was for me as well. Being a third wheel in God's hands is powerful, not disheartening or drudgery.
Ahhhh, how Almighty God can breath life into what seems so negative. And make me see the priviledge it is to be that third person......
May 18, 2010
January 14, 2008
This Is Best
My first birthday without my husband was just months following his death. I was surrounded by family that day, and though their presence was a great comfort, oh, how my heart was aching. I remember just sobbing as the pain seemed to engulf me and no relief seemed in sight.
"Oh, Lord, if I didn't love him so much, this wouldn't hurt as much!" I thought.
Very clearly the response was "I love him more than you, and I said this is best."
"But the boys need their father!" I cried.
"And I love them more than you do, and I said this is best."
"But I hurt sooooo much, Lord!!!!"
And He tenderly answered, "And I love you more than you can ever imagine and I said this is best."
Many, many months have past since that day, but the Lord's words have stayed with me, wrapping me in security and love. He said this is best.I don't have to understand why, or have all the answers. I just know He loves me. It was that great love that held Him to the cross, not the nails. That amazing love that cleanses me and keeps me. And that love is enough.
May 17, 2010
Lord, I pleaded, I have sown so many tears for these people through the years and I feel like I am losing the fight. I called on other trusted prayer warriors for I felt the burden just so heavy.
Give ear to my words, O LORD, consider my meditation.
Hearken unto the voice of my cry, my King, and my God: for unto thee will I pray.
My voice shalt thou hear in the morning, O LORD; in the morning will I direct my prayer unto thee, and will look up.
I stopped and prayed out loud His Holy Word.....and it ministered to my soul. God hears me. I have a listening ear with the King of kings and Lord of lords!! He cares. He loves these people more than I do! He is my King--He rules over all. He is my God, my personal, loving God who knows me better than I know myself. And He reminds me to look up. He is working on this even as I prayed and wept. He was already working on it behind the scenes and I was reminded of truths He taught me before:
1) God is sovereign over satan's attacks; He is in control.
2) God will work and who shall let (stop or hinder) it?
3) Beauty will rise from the ashes.
Peace washed over me, peace that passeth all understanding. And I could rest in knowing He was working. That He was still on the throne and something beautiful would come out of this all.
Recently I was praying and fasting for a friend and her situation. It was a relatively short fast and yet mentally a tough one. God was amazing as usual and worked mightily. Once the "storm" was over I felt the Lord say it is finished and I planned to get some food that very night after an event. Just as we were leaving, a lady who had been recognized for her hard work and given flowers, divided her bouquet and gave me some of the flowers. I tried to decline to no avail. I finally accepted them as a little blessing from the Lord for following His leading to fast and pray. As we left the place, it was down pouring, literally sheets of water! I dreaded the drive home. Yet as we got gas before leaving town, it stopped. All the way home, no rain. Yet ten minutes after being home, down pouring again! Another gift from God. On the way home, we had another blessing. Because of the sudden and heavy raining, there was some flooding, and I suddenly came upon a lot of water on the road completely covering my lane. No oncoming traffic was coming so I could quickly drive out of it into the other lane. Again another gift from God this time in protection.
After I had the kids all tucked in bed, I sat listening to the rain. I felt so blessed. God called me to be a prayer warrior. When He tells me to pray, it is my duty to do so. When He tells me to fast also, it is my duty, as a soldier, to endure it. I didn't broadcast what I was doing. I just let my friend know she was covered in prayer. Another friend was my prayer partner and that was another blessing, we grew closer because of it. But only God knew the specific details of it all. He didn't need to give me anything. Just watching Him at work was enough. Just knowing I had been obedient was enough. Yet these blessings were sweet whispers to my heart, acts of love that said to me, "I am proud of you, my daughter". And what girl doesn't long for her Daddy to say that?!
May 13, 2010
Snapp told me this morning that if he could give me a trophy it would be the Burning Heart Award given to those who have a heart that is on fire for the Lord. He went on to say that he would give me the Accountable Award because God can count on me. Too cute! And the Helping Award because I help people. Such sweet compliments from my little man.
It is always interesting to me to see myself through my child's eyes. May I keep my eyes on Christ and be worthy of His reward.
May 05, 2010
"I wasn't scared; if a coyote or wolf got me, I'd go to Heaven. And if they didn't, I knew you'd be here at home. "
His words reminded me of a story I heard of a woman who was so calm as the ship she was on was caught in a violent storm. When asked later why she was so calm, she explained that she had one daughter in heaven and another waiting for her at port. She knew she was going to see one of them soon, she just didn't know which.
Help me, Lord, to trust in You and have no fear.
May 02, 2010
A visiting preacher preached this message and I will simply type out my notes as I wrote them:
Isaiah 43:10-13 10
Ye are my witnesses, saith the LORD, and my servant whom I have chosen: that ye may know and believe me, and understand that I am he: before me there was no God formed, neither shall there be after me.I, even I, am the LORD; and beside me there is no saviour. I have declared, and have saved, and I have shewed, when there was no strange god among you: therefore ye are my witnesses, saith the LORD, that I am God. I am a witness to the world for my God; I have a personal relationship with Him and am chosen to testify of Him. To tell the world there is no other saviour besides Him! Yea, before the day was I am he; and there is none that can deliver out of my hand: I will work, and who shall let it?
God asked Isaiah to do some crazy things for him; God does the abnormal:)
"I am he" God is reminding them of Himself. He defends Himself. Asking, Do you remember Me?
God is not only defensive, He is offensive. God pursues us, God seeks us! We separate the God of the old testament and of now, that is our own fault. God is the same God with the same heart for us.
I will work and who will let it? "Let" means to stop it or hinder it.
On my best day, I will disappoint you. There are people stronger than me, things stronger than me. Thankfully I am not making this promise. God is and that changes everything. God is the "I am" He told that to Moses and in the new testament He was telling the people "I am the way, I am the good shepherd, I am the bread of life" John 1:1 says He took nothing and made something.
My word is not like God's Word. Core men crumble; we are attacked. Our word means less and less. This is not a promise of a man. He will.......He has all the power of the God!!! Hollywood's idea is that there is a power struggle between God and satan. That is not truth! God has ALL Power!! With one breath He could inialate all evil. The devil doesn't influence God's Word. he can't change what God has said. It either has or will come to pass. It is settled in heaven.
We say try harder, try harder; yet they are just flesh and blood. In this flesh, I have nothing better. God says I will work. There is a law in scripture, God does the work. Man rests on the finish work. Rest on God. God's work is above what we can dream. Eph. 3:20 says before you even thought of it, God was at work. He tells us, I am able to do exceedingly, abundantly above what we ask or think. We don't think like God. God is not like us. When He makes a promise, He keeps it!
God works to build faith. Proving Himself over and over again. How many times you cry out to God and He answers. Then the next time you think, Oh, I don't think He can do it." God is working a work of holiness in us. Yet often when God works, we don't like how He does it. God is at work. He did a work, remember Elijah at Mt. Carmel? God has done a work in ME! God doesn't need my help; God is doing something and I want to be with Him to see it! God is not done with this church or with your family...He just doesn't work the way you do or think. God can resurrect the dead!! There is no greater work than the resurrection.
Who is going to stop God's work? Not you..you won't stop God. It is my loss, my missing out if I get discouraged. God will raise up another. He will work. God will put you thorough the fire. Where was God when Joseph was in prison? Oh, He was there; He put him there. See God was at work.
I Will Work
(The Person) (The Power) (The Potential)
May 01, 2010
The story in a nutshell is Elisha the prophet would often stay at this family's home and they ended up building a room and furnishing it just for him. In thanksgiving for their kindness, he asked God to give them a child as they had none. As a result, they have a son; later he gets sick and dies. After the boy dies, the mother goes to find the man of God. On her way, she is asked how she is and she replies, "It is well." She knew that God had breathed life into her womb and she had a son. That same God could breathe life into her son again. She knew God was going to do something. The preacher went on to say this, "Trials don't ruin a person; they reveal a person. When it looks dark for you and your church, God can breath supernatural life! In the darkness say, It is well! It is well because God is still on the throne. So it will always be well."
Wow! Powerful words.......today I was speaking with another person who grieves a loved one. She commented on God soveriegnty becoming more real to her and seeing more of His goodness every day. I agreed; it is like I can breathe again. It took me 4 yrs to reach this point; it took her 7 yrs. The Lord gets a person to this place in His timing as He has many personal lessons for each of us on the way.