The Massage Therapist

November has blown away like an autumn leaf,
And December is here with it's whirlwind weather.
And I realize I haven't posted on my blog in almost 8 weeks!
I have been quite busy in my quietness from our blog.
After such a chaotic year,
I feel like I am getting some resemblence of order again.
Slowly.............
Life is stablizing, for a little while.....

I recently went for a Mommy Treat,
a back massage by my favorite massage therapist, Joy.
As I lay there getting pampered and listening to relaxing music,
I meditated on a thought I often think of during a massage.....

The LORD is like a massage therapist.

Yup, a massage therapist.
First, He waits for you to come to Him.
Next, He asks you where you feel stress and pain.
He listens to you with compassion,
then instructs you of what to do next.
Then He begins to work on you,
Sometimes His hands are gentle,
But He often has to work on you harder than you want,
because He finds things you didn't even know where there.
He uses heat, heat so hot yet He doesn't let you get burned,
hot heat to work out the wrinkles and kinks in you.
He speaks very little, but all the time He is constantly working on you.
As He works on you, you find yourself relaxing like you haven't in months,
and you could cry because His hands are so knowing about pain you didn't even realize you had. Gently but with determination He kneads and massages. Using oil, using heat, using pressure.......
His desire is to cleanse you, detoxify you, destress you......
And as usual, the time goes by fast, and reality calls you back.
Nothing in reality has changed. Bills need to be paid. Children need attention.
The laundry mountain is waiting and the house is needing repaired somewhere.
But inside you are changed. Inside you are more relaxed. More at peace. More trusting.
He reminds you before you leave to drink a lot of water daily, don't we all need His living water daily? We just get ourselves too busy to remember. You vow to drink more than you have been. And of course, before you go, you set up another appointment, for you know you need time with Him, for Him to work out your kinks again.

Yup, my LORD is like a massage therapist!
Have you made an appointment with HIM lately??

We need Christ daily. Daily we need to go to HIM. Every night I need to stretch out before HIM and share my heart and let Him work on me. And to be understanding of the pressure, and the heat, that they are to help me not to hurt me. His desire is not to burn me, but to better me. And when our time concludes, I will have His peace that passes all understanding.

Beauty for Ashes

So what does a young widow do on her wedding anniversary?

Celebrate her family......
That is the idea God gave me several years ago.
So we turned my wedding anniversary into JWS Family Days!!!
Because our family did begin on that day.
So now the days surrounding our wedding date we have fun,
celebrating our family kind of fun.

This year we did devotions on family verses,
ate meals with special homemade food,
biscuits, bread, dinner rolls, and more,
Did grave and leaf rubbings,
looked over baby books,
and photo albums,
shot BB guns,
went for a walk in the wood,
ended up busting up a dam of leaves at the creek,
returned home wet and pleased with ourselves,
had very fancy dining,
used the fine china from the china hutch,
elegant tablecloth and many candles,
had tea,
did devotions using ones grandpa had drawn for the boys in 2009,
and played board games.

I will admit the night before I was hit by a paralyzing grief wave.
I asked some praying sisters to pray.  The Lord was so gracious.
First the boys gave extra hugs and encouragement,
then God reminded me to write, so I journaled a couple pages.
I let the tears flow and received the comfort and peace only God can give.
Then God gave me ideas for the next day. 

Isaiah 61:3 To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.

God truly does give beauty for ashes.

Little Cup of Grace

Oh, sweet little cup of grace,
How we prayed for you,
to be conceived,
to grow healthly,
to be safe,
to be born without complications
without any trouble

Last week, in God's wisdom,
you finally came,
by C-section as God knew,
what was best for you,
and for your momma.

Cute as a button,
and healthy as a horse,
our little cup of grace,
is here!

Oh, the fun of being an aunt.

Word of Thanks

I wanted to use this post to say thank you to a sweet elderly lady who was used of God.  I don't know her name.  Only saw her twice briefly at a restaurant. Her husband was next to my youngest son at the buffet line.  She came over to our corner booth much later and asked if I was the boys' mother.  "Yes, I am!" I stated, unsure of what she was going to say. "You are doing such a good job of raising them," she sweetly said and turned to leave almost before I could say thank you.  We watched out the window as they went to their car. Her husband must of been in his late 80's or more. And she was a very graceful and elegant lady at least his age or slightly younger. 

 

Only God knew how at the store earlier how awful some of the boys' behaviour was and how discouraged I was as a mom. Being a mom of three rambuncious boys is not for wimps.  Being a single mom is even tougher.  Some days are just hard. Grocery shopping and eating out can be daring adventures on those days.  This sweet woman was used of God to give me hope, to remind me to look at the positives in my boys, and to prompt me to look for another mom to give encouragement to.  It just might be exactly what she needs to hear.   

 

Proverbs 16:24

Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.

 Proverbs 25:11

A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.

Proverbs 15:23

A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word spoken in due season, how good is it!

 Ephesians 4:29

Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.

Fret Not

Psalm 27:13-14I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.

Psalm 37:1-8 Fret not thyself.....Trust in the LORD and do good..............Commit thy way unto the LORD: trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.........Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for him: fret not thyself..........Cease from anger, and forsake wrath: fret not thyself in anywise to do evil

Theses verse spoke to my heart today.
Wait on the LORD and Don't fret
Seems to be the major themes that God is trying to speak to me
Rest in HIM; don't fret.

Sounds so easy.......Psalm 27:11-12 say Teach me thy way, O LORD, and lead me in a plain path, because of mine enemies. Deliver me not over unto the will of mine enemies for false witnesses are risen up against me, and such as breath out cruelty.

Some times my own mind is the enemy, or should I say used by the Enemy. Sometimes my own emotions are like a weapon against my own soul.

And finally I do what is needed.............
I run...............
I run to Jesus and cling.........................
And wait for His Comfort to wash over me
Wait for His peace to come
And cry out to Him to help me fret not.

Realigning My Thinking

On a cold February evening in 2006, my world was shattered into a million pieces. After the shock and numbness wore off, I felt like my body had been torn in half and my heart lay bleeding. Slowly, the reality that my beloved Jim was gone from this life began to sink into my mind. For awhile it hurt to breath, then it hurt to laugh, then it hurt to live, then suddenly it was time for our little precious Snurr to be born. It was an extremely difficult day. And most of that day and night, one thought kept screaming in my head, "Jim is suppose to be here for this!!!"

Since that day, I have had that thought countless times. When Snipp learned to ride his bike, when Snapp had questions I couldn't answer, when Snurr began to walk, when I had to make big decisions.........and hundreds of other times.

Recently I had that same thought, "Jim is suppose to be here for this."

Gently and firmly I felt God speak to my heart, "No, he isn't."

Whoa!!! I found myself holding my breath, stunned. First of all, this is the first time in all the times of me having that thought did I ever feel the Lord speak to my heart about it.

And secondly, I wanted to argue. In my mind, fathers aren't suppose to die when they have young boys at home to raise. Women my age aren't suppose to be widows. Boys are suppose to have dads there to help them with things, teach them things, and such. Dads are suppose to see their children's accomplishments and hugs their wives when they've had a long day with the little warriors. Dad are suppose to be there.........................................

The truth began to touch my heart even as I began to argue, that my ways are not God's ways. And His ways are best. That just because I think or the world thinks that life should be a certain way doesn't mean that is what God thinks.

Again my heart heard, "No, Jim isn't suppose to be here. That wasn't my plan from the beginning."

I'll be honest, my first reaction to that statement was pain. A big ouch! That all my dreams and Jim's dreams too were not what God wanted for us, that they weren't what was best................

Once again I fell into His lap spiritually and cried. I know my Lord loves me more than I will ever understand. I also know that I will never understand all His ways, but I can trust His heart. Christ proved His love on Calvary. Everything He allows in my life is for my good and His glory. Hurting, I clung to the One whose words had seared my heart. I felt held as I cried and let this new truth sink into my soul and try to realigned my thinking.

Jim isn't suppose to be here.
Neither are others who died,
or moved away,
or have stepped away.
Things are the way they are because God has a purpose and a plan.

Again my mind goes back to another cold February day as I stood up during the funeral service and read these words from the front of my Bible:

In times of confusion, remember these truths:

1. God has a plan; He is in control.
2. God's timing is always perfect.
3. We have nothing to fear.
4. We have much to learn.